Writing the Script

The script has been finalized after a couple of days of writing and reviewing it with my group. This was my entire process behind it.

First Draft

I began writing the first draft this Wednesday (February 26th) and finished it sometime last night. I attempted to give some time for my thoughts to develop on how I wanted the events to play out in the opening. My original version of the script was a full three pages and included the montage I wanted to incorporate for a while now. The spelling wasn't the best every now and then, but I focused more on getting my thoughts down onto the page for the first attempt. Here it is in full, with the actual screenshots I sent to my group once I finished writing it:

Page 1

Page 2

Page 3

Page 4

Keith Floyd is the protagonist and failed actor from the original outline I made last week. We definitely wanted a rock-star type of name associated with him, so we thought this one matched really well. There are only two other characters written into the opening that way we could minimize the amount of actors required for the production. These characters are Keith's manager, Cole Pines, and the talk show host, Mike Merriweather. For Cole Pines, I specifically wanted him to act informal with Keith to emphasize that they have worked together for a long time before Keith's depressive phase, therefore he would know Keith the best. One of the biggest techniques I tried to implement into the screenplay was using the dialogue to develop Keith's character rather than it being explicitly stated in depth. From Cole’s dialogue, the audience would know that Keith Floyd is not in a good place and his goal to find success once again, but not his motivations or other details about him. This also would help to gain interest from the audience as they would want to hear Keith’s story. The substance abuse Keith struggles with is illustrated when he pulls out a flask of alcohol, which causes Cole to get angry about it as if it was an ongoing issue.

Second Draft

For the most part, my group enjoyed the script, but thought it would be longer than the two minutes we were aiming for. I had to agree. A full montage and short scene is a lot to pack in when trying to make the piece flow smoothly. In order to shorten it, I had to consider all aspects of the script to see what was important and what was unnecessary. This I believe also turned out to be a great method of evaluating the quality of the screenplay. I decided that cutting out the montage would make the most sense, but as well removing Mike Merriweather asking Keith Floyd if he was fine as it would most likely drag on too long and feel out of place in general. I also took the time to improve the dialogue and fix any grammatical errors to make sure the writing was fine. Rereading through the dialogue led to subtle changes that would help the flow of Keith and Cole's conversation, as well as improvements in the content of what is said. For example, instead of the generic "Break a leg" Cole says from the first draft, I changed it to "Show em' who you really are" to subtly plant the question into the audience mind of who Keith is. The idea is that this will cause viewers to wonder if Keith has genuine good within him or if his inner conflicts have changed his personality to something permanently disastrous. Once I finished with the second draft, the rest of my group took a peak of what I wrote and happily approved in class yesterday. I hope you’ll enjoy it as much as we do:



INT. - INTERVIEW ROOM - N/A

The year is 1987 and the cocaine epidemic is at an all time high in the city of stars: Hollywood. Here, the world's expectations of glamour would be shattered if they truly know what their favorite actors were up to off camera. One of these tragic stories is of a once beloved actor facing not only his last shot in having career, but a good life.

Stress, pressure, and anxiety fill the atmosphere. Too much is at stake for washed-up actor KEITH FLOYD, who has been a recluse for years. He is currently suffering through depression, loneliness, and drug and alcohol abuse. He is planning on bringing his life back through a stellar comeback performance in a new generic action film from the era. He hopes that maybe the fame will save him once again, a foolish mindset which will only backfire instead of finding real help. Keith is standing in a hallway next to the set of an interview with his manager COLE PINES, the only person keeping his life on track. Cole is giving Keith a pep talk on the interview.

                COLE PINES

        (Sounding like a strict parent)

    Alright, just like we rehearsed. You go in there and give 'em the biggest smile of your life, explain a bit about your lead roll in the film, show some heart, and hit 'em with a bit of enthusiasm, it works like a charm.

Cole looks down for a brief second at a folder containing the rest of Keith’s schedule for the day.

                COLE PINES

    Look pal, you got this in the bag, so no need to stress.

Ironically, as this lecture occurs, Keith pulls out a flask of liquor out of the inside of his coat and drinks it. Cole looks back up and angrily snatches it out of his hand. Honestly, he's surprised that Keith is attempting to do anything at all with his damned life at this point and is infuriated with the fact he's slipping up once again. Cole tries not to make a scene.

                COLE PINES

        (Angry but very hushed)

    Get this shit outta here!

                KEITH FLOYD

        (Jittery and sarcastic)

    Look, it’ll make me feel better. I thought you wanted me to show some heart?

                COLE PINES

    All you’re doing is making the headlines better when the tabloids find out how fucked your life has been after—

Keith intervenes before Cole goes too far.

                KEITH FLOYD

        (Trying to be stern)

    I don't need to hear any of your damn whining right now.

                COLE PINES

    Well, you also don’t need to be drinking any of this either. This is your only shot to get your reputation back. Remember that. 

Cole puts his hand on Keith's shoulder and pats him onward to the set.

                COLE PINES

        (Suddenly enthusiastic)

    Show em' who you really are.

Keith walks forward sighing. He traverses against the crowd of grips and television equipment to take a seat on a fuzzy couch. He looks up at the lights in a state of dissonance and feels trapped. Without noticing, the interviewer, MIKE MERRIWEATHER, takes a seat next to him. A crew member at this time begins to set up Keith’s lavaliere microphone.

                MIKE MERRIWEATHER

    Keith... Keith... Keith, can ya hear me?

Keith gets out of his trance and awkwardly responds to Mike.

                KEITH FLOYD

        (Dazed and confused)

    Uh, yeah. Yeah, sorry.

A crew member yells out that there is only 10 seconds before the show starts. Mike looks away from Keith with a confused face and fixes his posture as he turns to look at the camera. Keith attempts to awkwardly replicate Mike’s elegance, but gives up and slouches. Keith closes his eyes and breathes in as the floor manager of the show counts down from 5 seconds. The intro for the television program plays. Mike introduces himself and Keith to the audience.

                MIKE MERRIWEATHER

        (With a strong voice)

    Good evening, and welcome to another episode of Entertainment Daily. I’m your host Mike Merriweather, and tonight we’re going to be talking with the highly celebrated actor Keith Floyd. Keith, how are you after all of this time away from the big screen?

Keith forces a smile and answers Mike’s question.

                KEITH FLOYD

        (Enthusiastic, but jittery and forced)

    Well Mike, um, I’m doing great!